Before We Die
by SummerAnneSnape
Summary: During the battle, Hermione goes to an extreme to save Severus Snape, her secret love. But what she doesn't know is the cost. Now she's back at Hogwarts to teach. With only a short amount of time left for her, will she let him know how she feels? Will he return those feelings? What will stand in the way of their love? We know one thing, love endures all. M for possible Lemons.
1. Just Years

**Hello Everyone! This is my first post on fan fiction. I'm just an amateur writer who decided she wanted to play with Harry Potter and JK Rowling's amazing world. This is a Hermione/Severus story, so if thats weird to you , I'd advise you to leave now. I'm planning on there being some light lemons, ergo the M rating. I have outlined the entire story, so I do know exactly where I'm going, but if you have any ideas, I would LOVE to hear from you in the reviews. Who knows, maybe I'll use it in a future chapter! Also, I'd appreciate constructive criticism, but no flames please. **

**I do not own anything Harry Potter, only my plot ideas are my own. **

**Sit back, relax, and enjoy this slightly fluffy, very tragic story about two of the most amazing wizards of all time. **

* * *

Hermione Granger took a deep breath as she placed the last of her newly bought robes into a trunk. Flicking her wand and muttering a shrinking spell, she then picked up the fist size trunk and placed it in her pocket. Glancing around her bedroom at Grimmauld place, Hermione sighed.

Everyone was still somewhat mad at her for not staying at the burrow all summer. It's not that she didn't enjoy being with the Weasleys, but every time she went there, it was as if you could feel the awkwardness bubbling from her. Her sudden relationship with Ron was short and… just short really.

Hermione always knew that a relationship with him would end quickly. She just could never connect with him well. He wasn't nearly as intelligent or mature as she needed a lover to be. She gave Ron the chance he begged for, but after a month of useless snogging and meaningless conversation, Hermione had to end it. Besides, her heart was in a different place….

Harry understood, thankfully. He gladly let her stay with him for the remainder of the summer. He had gotten engaged to Ginny in July and they would be getting married after she completed this last year at Hogwarts. Hermione wished she could have her happily ever after as well. But she knew that it wouldn't be a possibility with the way her stupid mind decided to go and how her life planned out…

Hermione shook her head and made her way through the hall and down the stairs. She didn't want to ruin her day by thinking negatively.

Harry sat on the dark colored sofa and was reading the Daily Prophet."Anything interesting?" Hermione asked him as she checked herself in a mirror for the last time.

Harry chuckled. "Of course not. Nothing ever happens anymore. There's nothing to write about except this useless crap by Rita Skeeter." He poked the moving page he was reading and scoffed.

Hermione hated the woman. All she did was twist every single word that came out of a person's mouth, and interpret all actions into some juicy bit of gossip. Ever since that woman's stunt in Hermione's fourth year, the mentioning of the reporter sent Hermione's skin crawling and her mouth begging to spew the foulest of curse words her brain knew of.

"I don't even want to know what she wrote today." Hermione spoke with fervor. "Last week she wrote a horrific article about me. She said that I completely shattered Ron's heart and was caught cheating on him with some other quidditch player."

Harry nodded, he must have read it as well. "Anyways, I don't need my day to be ruined by what ever she wrote. I have to get going, Harry. I have a teachers meeting tonight." Hermione spoke, somewhat lightened by the idea, soon to be realized dream, of teaching.

Harry stood and came over to Hermione. Smiling, he wrapped his arms around his best friend and spoke, "I'm really going to miss you, Hermione. I'd come back and finish up but…" His voice stopped.

"But it'd be too hard to be there." Hermione understood. The majority of seventh years couldn't go back, with all they witnessed it was just too difficult. But Hermione loved Hogwarts and battle scars or not, it was her home. "Well, enjoy your Auror training, Harry. I'm going to miss you too." Harry gave her a friendly kiss on the forehead; it felt like they were brother and sister rather than best friends.

"I'll write you a lot." Harry let go of Hermione and she opened the front door. She chuckled as she pulled her wand out of her robes pocket.

"You better." Then she did a quick spin on her heels and concentrated hard on apparating to Hogwarts. The feeling was still not normal to her. Every time she apparated she still felt strange for a few moments afterwards.

As her world had stopped moving again, Hermione looked at the front gates of Hogwarts. Memories suddenly flooded her every sense.

**Flash back**

_Hermione ran frantically through the ruins of what used to be her safe haven. Now it was the graveyard to many of her loved ones. Running away from the castle, she headed towards the shrieking shack. Hermione was terrified of what she might see. _

_She recalled Voldemort casting the horrid spell upon Severus Snape: The man she'd had a crush on for years, but for the last two years had fallen completely over her heels for. Hermione knew he loathed her for being a know-it-all and a Gryffindor, but that didn't stop her from loving his intellect, his maturity, and yes, his looks and voice. _

_She remembered Professor Snape shielding her from Remus when he was uncontrollable in his werewolf form. Hermione knew that during that year she'd developed a crush on her dark teacher. She had complete faith in him when Harry accused Snape over and over in Sixth Year. And when it was said that Severus had killed Albus Dumbeldore, she knew that he did it for the light side. Hermione loved him that year, and seeing him get attacked by the evilest man on the planet and then bit by Nagini, she had to use everything she had not to fall to the floor gasping for air and sobbing. _

_While she ran, Hermione went over the spell The Dark Lord had used on Severus. It was a special spell, as was all his magic. The venom of the snake was similar. One couldn't just remove it or heal it over time. It had to be transferred. Maybe if she could just get some of the curse and venom out of him he'd have a chance… _

_She arrived at the shrieking shack and prayed in her heart to whoever was watching that they would spare him. She loved him… _

_Hermione entered the shack and held her breath as she reached the pale skinned, raven haired man. Immediately she dropped to her knees and sat in the blood that pooled near him. Fighting back tears, Hermione placed an ear on his chest, listening. _

_There was a faint pulse still there. She made a noise of gratitude that it wasn't too late. Pulling her wand out, she knew what she had to do… She learned in Defense Against the Dark Arts that some spells that you couldn't get rid of or canceled could still be transferred. _

_With a shaking hand, she placed her wand on his chest and spoke the words, " trans maldice." _

**End Flashback**

Hermione didn't want to think about it anymore. She knew what would happen when she said those words, but she didn't know it would mean her life. Hermione took on some of her beloved Severus Snape's curse and venom. She knew it would bring pain, but not like this.

Madame Pomfrey told her the effects of her decision when she brought Severus back to the infirmary. Taking on his pain and suffering for him meant that she, Hermione Jean Granger, a nineteen-year-old witch who should have plenty of life to live, was going to die in a matter of years. But she would do it all over again if it meant he was safe.

* * *

**Don't forget to review! It doesn't have to be long or anything, just anything you have to say is greatly appreciated. :) **

**-Summer**


	2. Biting Remarks

**Hey guys! I could not believe the response I got from you all! It was unbelievable! I never expected to get that many views, reviews or followers on my first fan fiction post! I'm still on a high from it. :) I know I posting really soon, which I know you'll be happy about, but don't always expect it. I'm going on vacation in about a week, and I'm not sure if theres wifi. But I'll write while I'm there, and I'll try to post when I can before then. I'm really into this, so I think I'll write a lot. **

**This chapter focuses more on the minds of our favorite characters, which is honestly my favorite thing to read in a story. So, I hope I did alright. Writing about Severus is extremely difficult. Capturing him perfectly is something only JK Rowling can do. But I gave my best effort. I think with practice I'll do a bit better. So be patient I guess? :/**

**Anyways, your reviews were awesome last time; soooo amazing! Keep up the great reviews, and feel free to give me any constructive criticism. I'd love it just as much as praise! **

**Well, I'm just blabbering now. Hope you enjoy this installment!**

**I don't own anything Harry Potter. Only this plot is my own.**

* * *

Severus Snape groaned at his desk while he planned for another year of teaching Potions. Another year that he had not expected to be on earth. _I shouldn't be here. Stupid Granger. _But Snape was not being true to himself; he kept denying his feelings ever since he truly noticed her in her sixth year.

Even in the first few years he knew she was different. Hermione was abnormally bright, kind, loyal, even though she was sometimes excruciatingly loyal. And in the last few years, she had become a beautiful woman. Her honey eyes always were so determined in his classroom, and he loved how hard she pushed herself. Only she could stand up to him intellectually. Severus knew he loved her deep inside, probably more than he ever loved Lily.

Their occasional banter was the reason Severus rose from his bed some days. In Granger's sixth year she challenged him many times in the classroom, throwing back insults like it was her job. It made him both angry and entranced with her at the same time. There were a few moments, like when she came to speak to him after class about a paper, where he wanted to just yell at her and kiss her hard on those tantalizing lips. He knew it was wrong to have those feelings for a student, but Severus' heart had been softened to the girl.

And to make things worse, he felt as if he owed everything to her. After she saved his life he knew he was utterly screwed. Severus's love only grew every time he thought about her.

Last month, when McGonagall had told him that the lovely Miss Granger would be coming to teach Muggle Studies this year, he wasn't sure whether he was excited or terrified. Severus never got the chance to thank the girl for everything she'd done for him, so he later became very nervous and with good reason.

Severus's curse had only been taken partially away from him. Hermione had taken only so much away that it just withheld death for a while. Madame Promfrey said she could hold it off for a maximum of four years. And before that time came, Severus had promised himself that he would show his feelings to his lovely Hermione, so that when he was gone, someone could say he wasn't a total bastard his whole life and that yes, Severus Snape did have feelings.

Glancing at the clock, he realized the teachers meeting would begin in about an hour. Severus gasped and jumped from his desk, nerves almost making his knees quake. _Snap out of it Snape. You are the dark potions master. Nothing scares you. Ever. She's just some girl._ Severus put on his usual stone mask as he returned to his dungeon quarters. But deep in his mind he knew that she wasn't just some girl. She was love itself, and he couldn't die without letting her know it at least once.

* * *

Hermione took in her new rooms that McGonagall had taken her to after she'd arrived. She saw a decently sized sitting room with an expansive bookcase. A good thing since Hermione had brought a large portion of her books with. Near it was a large fireplace made of some dark colored stone. A plush, deep green couch was near it and also a perfect, black reading chair and foot rest. Hermione felt at home in this warm atmosphere. There was plenty of space for Hermione to add her own touches, but overall it was similar to how she would have done it.

"It's quite lovely, Professor." Hermione looked over her shoulder and smiled at her old teacher.

"Oh yes. I tried my best to make it homey. I added extra book space because well… If there is anything to know about Hermione Granger, its that she loves reading and learning." The spectacled woman chuckled, then sighed. "Well, I'll leave you to look around at the rest and prepare for tonight."

Professor McGonagall walked over to Hermione and wrapped her arms about her. The older Professor spoke, " I could not be more happy that you are here." Hermione stepped back and put on her best smile.

Once her professor had left the room Hermione instantly flopped onto the lush couch. She pulled her feet close to her and sighed. Guilt washed over her. Hermione had forced Madame Pomfrey not to tell anyone that she had a terminal illness. So, not even McGonagall knew that in a few years time, she'd need to find a new Muggle Studies Professor…

She knew everything would be different if everyone knew. No one would treat her the same anymore. Now, Hermione had to resort to hiding everything inside herself, under a seemingly impenetrable mask of happiness.

Inside, Hermione was breaking. Breaking to let someone know, someone to help her with the burden of coming to grips with dying.

But Hermione still wanted to make the most of every moment that she had left. At the very top of her list was to get to know Severus Snape, and to at least tell him that she loved him. _Before I leave this world, someone needs to tell that man that he is loved. Truly loved. _

After a time of staring blankly at the ceiling, Hermione grudgingly got up and drug her bags into the bedroom. Again, the color scheme was simple. Deep greens and blues accented the sheets and blankets, and the bed… The bed was a massive, deep brown wood color with intricate ivy details on the headboard. It reminded Hermione of her wand.

On the other side of the room sat a dresser in the same wood color and two doors. Hermione assumed that one lead to a closet and another to a bathroom. She opened one and peeped her head in. Inside a large porcelain bathtub was calling her name. Grabbing a towel and all her toiletries, Hermione headed into the bathroom again and started a bath. When it was bubbling over with steam, she slid in and involuntarily let out a deep sigh. It was a sigh of tiredness, longing and also hope. Tiredness of hiding inside herself, longing to let go, and hope that something would turn out right in her life.

After removing herself from the heavenly water, Hermione put on her best teaching robes and cast a quick drying spell on her hair. Taming her hair still was a challenge sometimes, but usually it would fall naturally into medium sized curls. Thankfully, being older meant the frizziness died down and left a nice shine instead.

Hermione wasn't one to overdue it on the makeup. So, she just put on some light foundation to cover one scar that hadn't gone away fully yet and some peachy lip gloss. Once she was ready, she placed her wand in her pocket and hurried out of her rooms.

While walking at a somewhat slow pace, she suddenly realized who she would be seeing in a matter of minutes. She couldn't help it. Her heart started to pound, she could feel it everywhere in her body. Hermone shook her head. _Get a grip Granger. It'll be like any other day around Professor Snape. _ Hermione huffed and put on a stone face. _Of course… You haven't seen him since you left him in the infirmary… And he probably still loathes you. _

Hermione wasn't going to let anything stop her. Maybe, if she didn't panic to badly, a civil conversation could be brought up. Without realizing it, she had walked all the way to the staff room. Upon entering, she was met face to face with Madame Pomfrey. Hermione gasped for breath as she was enveloped into a rib-shattering embrace.

"Oh, Hermione! It's wonderful to see you." The elderly woman stepped back and looked her up and down, scrutinizing her every visible inch of skin. When her eyes stopped at her face, Hermione was staring at her with an expression that was questioning the obvious. "I haven't told anyone. I promise, Hermione." She whispered as Professor Flitwick also came in the room and noticed Hermione.

The small Professor waddled over as Madame Pomfrey spoke calmly once more, "We must talk later." Her expression was as if they were speaking about the weather, but Hermione knew that she meant absolute business. The old woman strode off, greeting Professor Sprout with a loud exclaim.

* * *

Severus sat in the corner of the room, unmoving. He knew he should be social, but that was never one of his qualities. He was definition of an introvert. He sat pondering what he would say when he was to ever strike up a first conversation with the Granger girl._ Stop calling her Granger girl. You know she's more than that. You can't talk like that around her, or she will never stop hating you._

He almost stopped breathing when she walked into the room. She still looked beautiful, maybe even more. Her smile, as she greeted and embraced her previous Professors, was dazzling. He should get up and greet her, but was that to forward? His mind was racing._ No_. His hard side of his mind said to stay seated. Too soon. _She'd talk to you if she actually wanted to. But of course that would never happen…_

So, he sat and watched Hermione as she finally took a seat at the head of the room near Flitwick and Vector. He changed his focus of attention onto Professor McGonagall, new Headmaster of Hogwarts, the first female in a long time. Severus was hoping she would drone on for a long time so he could hold off being introduced as deputy head, but the time came and he strode up to the front of the room, hard faced and eyes pierced.

* * *

Hermione sat up straighter as she heard his name spoken. She watched, enraptured by his stride to the front. She tried not to stare too intensely at him, but right as he made it to the podium, she noticed him glare right at her. Her whole body shivered. His obsidian eyes bore into hers. Severus's expression was the usual stern, icy glare that Hermione was use to, but she was still shocked that he stared straight at her.

The glance lasted only seconds before he was drawling out in his baritone voice about safety of students. Hermione could tell that he did not exactly love speaking on the subject, but she couldn't help but bathe in his voice. It was honey and wine. Sultry and sexy even when speaking about simple things. She almost didn't notice when he spoke her name.

"Miss Granger has been invited back to Hogwarts, apparently, to teach Muggle Studies. Our prize student from the last seven years." He drawled out sarcastically and emphasized the certain words while he spoke. Hermione stared straight at him when he spoke her name.

While the room clapped for a moment, Severus looked right back at her, this time it was more intense. His thoughts jumbled for a moment when he saw her honey eyes. So warm and inviting. He couldn't stare at her like a young boy, so he jerkily looked at the back of the room and blinked his eyes hard.

After finishing up his speech, Headmaster McGonagall spoke on a few last things such as house unity and encouragement towards students before wishing all the Professors a challenging and fulfilling school year.

Hermione got up and again was swarmed by old Professors greeting and chatting with her. Hermione could be very good at conversation with people, but after a while, it just drained her of energy and a good mood. She longed for the peace and quiet of a book and warm bed. Hermione shook the hand of her last Professor and promised Madame Pomfrey that she would speak with her tomorrow.

Quickly, Hermione rushed towards the door and reached for the handle, but just as she was inches from holding it, a large pale hand beat her to it. Hermione knew those hands, and she immediately tried to breath deeply.

"Well Miss Granger, it seems you aren't the most vigilant of people I've met. Something on your mind?" Severus drawled. He couldn't control his snarkiness towards her. She made him get on edge.

"Well, no. Just a head ache is all, Professor." She lied, but almost stuttered. Severus opened the door and headed out. Hermione panicked and rushed out after him. "Your speech was quite lovely, Professor." That had completely popped out of her mouth, she just wanted to say anything to him.

He slowly turned around and glared at her. "If anything, that speech was dreadful and god knows I didn't want to do it. But _dear_ old McGonagall insisted." He put emphasis on dear.

This flustered Hermione. "Don't be rude to her, _Sir_. Besides, you should be thankful to her for making you head deputy." Hermione spat back at him.

He stalked over towards her with a heated stare and was just a foot away from her when he stopped. Hermione could feel his breath on her face, "Just because you are now a Professor and are on a somewhat equal level to me, gives you no right to talk back to _me_, _Granger."_ And with that, he went fuming at himself, and at her, down the halls with his cloak billowing behind him.

Hermione stood frozen for a moment before running to her rooms, almost in tears.

* * *

**Well, I hope my first attempt at Severus wasn't too ghastly. I'm hoping to keep him still very broody and dark, but Hermione has gotten a special side of him that has been stored up for awhile. I know its there. He loved Lily, cried for her, watched over her son even though he loathed James. I know that Severus Snape has a loving side somewhere. It just deep... really deep. And he has a hard time tapping into it. **

**-Summer**


	3. Avoidance

**Before We Die **

**Chapter 3: Avoidance**

**Hey guys! I'm soooo glad you guys enjoyed my second installment! It is encouraging to know that I did decently with Severus, I was nervous it would be terrible. But now I'm a tad more confident. I really like this chapter, so I hope you all do too! **

**Extra love to those of you who reviewed! Don't forget, any ideas are always considered! Who knows, your idea could be featured in a future chapter. Constructive criticism is just as great as praise too! **

**_Note: Italics are thoughts._  
**

**Finally, I don't own anything hp recognizable. Only plot and characters I made up are mine. ex. new DADA prof. in this chapter.**

**Enjoy reading!**

* * *

Hermione awoke the next morning with an ache all over. She'd cried for the longest time after she had gotten back to her chambers, with barely a clue as to why. Severus was always rude, why should she be so hurt by his words?

But he_ knew_ that she'd saved his life. He now had a chance to live; she gave everything to him. Her life, her love. Of course, Severus didn't _know_ that Hermione sacrificed even her life for him, but he knew she'd been the one to come back to rescue him. Did that mean nothing to him?

Then again, Hermione had never seen the man be grateful for anything in her seven years at Hogwarts, so maybe he really didn't feel any gratitude at all. But even the slightest acknowledgement would be amazing to her. Just being acquaintances would be better than this hatred he seemed to hold against her still.

Hermione dragged herself through a simple morning routine. Shower, dress, feed Crooks, and remember wand. Walking slowly through the halls, she made her way down to Madame Pomfrey's office. Hermione had promised to meet her before the students arrived that afternoon.

She'd skipped breakfast to avoid seeing him, plus she felt if anything went in her stomach it would come right back up. Moments before entering the infirmary, Hermione put on her most convincing smile and pushed open the doors. The mediwitch was bustling about, checking inventory, noting what she still needed more of, grabbing sheet sets and magically setting them to work on making the cots up.

"Hello, Madame Pomfrey!" Hermione called and startled the older woman out of her concentration.

"Oh, Hermione dear! Come in, come in! Let me just finish up this last thing and we'll talk." She spoke as she jotted down a few more things, she lifted her head up. "Oh and Hermione, dear, please call me Poppy. You're a student no longer." She winked as she set her quill down and motioned Hermione to follow her into her office.

Hermione followed her and sat in front of her desk. The mediwitch sighed. "So, Hermione, how have you been feeling?" Her face was difficult to read.

"I've been feeling completely normal actually. I've been taking the potion you've been sending monthly. It seems to be doing it's job just right." Hermione smiled, trying to act like it's no big deal.

"That's good, I'll check on your neck after we finish chatting just to be sure." Poppy nodded to herself. Her face fell slightly, "But Hermione, how are _you_ doing with this? It must be difficult coming to grips with all this…"

Hermione cut her off, "I'm fine. If I weren't, I wouldn't be here. I want to live life to the fullest, so I want to teach. I'm the Gryffindor princess, I can deal with anything." Hermione spoke, hoping her tone didn't betray her.

"I heard about Mr. Weasley and you. You better not have broken things off because of this." Poppy stared straight at Hermione, acting liker her mother or something. "You cannot push people away from you."

_Oh on the contrary…_Hermione thought for a moment. "We broke up because he was never the right one for me, Poppy. Trust me, this illness is not stopping me from love. I can promise you that." Her voice was firm with determination.

Madame Pomfrey stared at her for a moment, contemplating something, but then sighed as she dismissed it. "Well, dear, lets check on your neck, shall we?"

* * *

Severus sat at the breakfast table, listening to McGonagall go on about some new technique in transfiguration. He wasn't really paying attention, though. Staring at his uneaten porridge, he scowled. _She isn't at breakfast._

Severus felt somewhat guilty about the day before. He'd hoped their first conversation could be normal, that he wouldn't be the usual dick that he seemed. But of course, he was annoyed because of having to speak about a topic Severus had no interest in. _She should have known better than to comment on it._ He nodded to himself. _Don't speak like that. You love her…_

_Maybe she was just being kind… Or mocking? Or maybe she just felt awkward. I know I did. _Severus sighed, tired from thinking. _But why won't she come to breakfast? _ _Was I really that awful? _Severus jumped when a hand flashed in front of him.

"Severus? Severus, are you all right?" Minerva looked at him curiously and with concern.

"I am perfectly fine, Minerva. Just ecstatic for the school year…" He spoke with a sarcasm soaked tone.

The older witch chuckled, she knew him well. He had become like a son to Minerva. "Well, you had better be." She said just to annoy him. "With Hermione here, you returning to potions professor, and no war happening, this year is bound to be one of our best yet. Nothing to distract…" She stared at Severus as his mind began to wander again.

Hermione still hadn't arrived. Severus's brow furrowed in frustration, and finally after countless reasons for her not arriving, he took a deep breath. Severus needed to think, and preferably alone…

* * *

Hermione had to literally force herself to go to the front gate and greet the arriving students. After her quick okay from Poppy, Hermione headed back to her chambers, praying that she could avoid all people. She was in one of those moods today where socializing was the last thing she desired to do.

Hermione had stayed in her chambers all the rest of the day and when she had almost arrived at the gate, she prayed that she could again avoid Professor Snape. The new DADA professor, Anthony Demicus, arrived at the same moment as Hermione. He was a tall, blonde hair, blue eyed man in his mid to late twenties. From the way his robes fit, Hermione could tell he was well toned. Any normal girl would be frozen in their steps when they saw him.

But of course, Hermione was no normal girl. Her tastes were for the tall, dark, and intriguingly handsome men. Severus's face flashed in her mind. The man would not get out of her thoughts. _Why couldn't you fall for someone like him? At least someone you had a chance of getting. I am such an idiot. _

"Why hello, Hermione." Anthony greeted, flashing his perfect, pearly white teeth. Hermione was not phased one bit, but still returned the smile.

"Hello, Anthony." Hermione hoped he wouldn't continue, but then a question came to her mind. "Do you know who is supposed to be here for gate greeting besides us?"

He nodded. "Yeah. Me, you, Fillius, and I believe Severus and possibly Hagrid." He spoke with such a happy tone it made Hermione sick. Well, multiple things made Hermione sick…

"Thanks." They continued walking in silence. Hermione must have been vibrating with tension, because the normally very talkative young man was speechless. He knew speaking would not be in his best interest.

_What do I do? Act normal, Hermione. Don't give him any more reasons to hate you. Leave him entirely alone. Maybe someday I can try again, but right now, avoidance is key. I need to let him be. _

Hermione braced herself to see a dark, gloomy, and glaring potions master at the gate, but he was not there, nor did he arrive in the next fifteen minutes. The students began to file in, laughing, greeting and hugging each other.

In between "hello!" and "welcome back to Hogwarts!" Hermione nudged Hagrid who stood next to her. He was one of the few people who she actually really, really enjoyed being around. He was just so go-lucky and happy, it made her feel better. "Where's Se.. Professor Snape?" Hermione caught herself.

Hagrid looked down at her with his thinking face, "Hmmm… I dun know." Suddenly he chuckled. "'e does this e'ery year. I ain't sayin 'e liked i', bu' 'e was always 'ere tuh say ello."

Hermione tried her very hardest not to show her fallen heart, but she knew Hagrid could tell, because he stopped talking altogether. Hermione continued welcoming the students and gave large hugs to Luna and Ginny. But she didn't really know what was happening. _Is he avoiding me? Hagrid said he always greets, even though he hates it. It must be me. _

_Shouldn't I be happy? Now I don't have to deal with his snarky ass or evil glares. Avoidance is key. Maybe he'll forget if he ignores me too. _Then maybe try again…

_I promised myself that I'd tell him everything someday. I guess I'll just have to wait awhile. _Hermione's heart ached when she thought those words.

She didn't want to wait anymore… Because that meant less time for Hermione to be content. She needed him to know… Even though she knew he would mock her, she needed that peace of knowing she tried. Being a Gryffindor means that you are bold, and bold she would be.

* * *

That evening, once everyone had been seated, the sorting hat ceremony began. Hermione only sat two seats away from Severus, Anthony Demicus was in between them, smiling like a model. Hermione noticed many of the girls were staring at him. _Lockhart all over again._

Hermione tried to avoid looking at Severus, but she couldn't help it. Being so close to him was nerve-racking, so she tried to focus as hard as possible on the sorting ceremony.

The hat began with it's story and song. The first name was called out, and in the end, Hufflepuff received nine new students, Revenclaw: eleven, Gryffindor: twelve, and Slytherin: nine. The hat stopped speaking and Headmaster McGonagall stood up to speak before the feast.

"Welcome, and welcome back to another year at Hogwarts, a year many were not so sure we would have." McGonagall then went to speak about the past war and how it changed us and this school, physically and mentally. Hermione could agree with her on that easily. She finally finished up with how productive and marvelous the coming year would turn out to be with less stress on everyone. "Let the feast begin!"

The sound of wonder filled awe echoed through the great hall. Hermione reached for the roast, when another pale hand grasped for the serving knife at the same moment. "Let me, Granger." He spoke, monotone.

Hermione didn't speak. She watched as Severus cut a decently sized piece, reached over Demicus, and gently laid it on her plate. Hermione caught his eyes for a moment, and she couldn't look away. He paused for a moment, before jerking away and staring at the back wall, glaring at an invisible something.

"Thank you, Severus." Hermione whispered to herself. She didn't have the courage to say it directly to him. Ignoring him like she knew he was, she went on eating her meal.

But on the contrary, Severus couldn't ignore her. He looked at her though the corner of his eye every moment he could, and when she whispered his name… He shivered slightly in his seat. _I'll go mad if this tension lasts much longer. Even though it's been only a day I have to try harder. I need to learn to be less tense. _He scoffed in his mind. _As if that'll ever happen. I have to try, though. At least for her._

* * *

**I hope you like where this is going. I promise, it gets more interesting as the year goes on. I've got lots of things planned for these two. ;)**

**-Summer**


	4. Determined

**Before We Die**

**Chapter 4: Determined**

**Hi everyone! Its been a little longer than the past length between updates, and for that I apologize. But a muse has to be there for a good story to work. ;) Anyways, I loved seeing all those follows and fans, but I was a little disheartened by lack of reviews. Don't forget, even short words of encouragement mean the world to a writer. I also love constructive critics.**

_**Sentences in italics are thoughts. **_

**I don't own anything Harry Potter, only plot is my own and any characters that I make up in my own head. **

**Well, enough blabber, get on with is Summer! Enjoy this next installment of Before We die!**

* * *

The first month of the school year was enjoyable for Hermione for the most part. She absolutely loved teaching, especially about muggles. Always prepared, Hermione was already changing the way the students viewed the class and muggles.

Muggle Studies was one of the lesser-wanted classes, but those who were taking it were thoroughly enjoying it, even the work. The third years had just had a lesson on muggle instruments and how they are almost identical to wizzards, except they aren't charmed in any way and they can't play themselves if desired. Professor Hermione had brought in a few of the more unusual muggle instruments with her so the children could try them after their lecture. Hermione still assigned homework, though. It must have been her old habits coming back to her, but she did assign a lot.

Even though few older students took the class, hype was getting around to everyone that the class was very interesting and even though it had a lot of work, it was really fun. Hermione became many students favorite professor, especially to the Gryffindors. Some even came to her after school hours to ask for help on subjects other than Muggle Studies if they weren't taking it.

Hermione was very proud with the progress she'd made even in the first few weeks with them. Her fellow professors wondered how she got the students to really enjoy the class that previously was not frequented by students. Hermione knew it was partially to the war being over. With no pressure to hate muggles and people wanting to change, her class could thrive.

"Thank you so much, Professor Granger!" A small, blonde, fourth year, Gryffindor smiled brightly and clutched her books to her chest. "I think I finally understand why I keep doing it wrong in Potions." She sighed.

Hermone forced a smile to her lips, this was touchy in her mind. "You're very welcome, Miss Vonn. Come again any time. You are one of my best students." Hermione chuckled.

The young girl smiled sheepishly. " I will. I don't think I could ever go to Professor Snape after that time I tried last year…" Hermione watched the girl almost cringe. _Probably yelled and had no patience, "Stupid Gryffindor."_

"Anyways, Good bye, Professor Granger." Miss Vonn scurried out of the room, and the second the door was shut, Hermione let out a sigh of exhaustion. She loved being here, teaching, helping to fix all that was planted into the young pupil's minds about wizards being superior to muggles.

But she couldn't stand being at Hogwarts either. She couldn't stand avoiding Severus at all costs. She always felt torn between want and need.

Her want was to confront him, ask him if they could be civil, and maybe, just maybe not try to verbally kill each other each time they spoke together. Hermione wanted to befriend him, to show him that they could get along. To love…

But Hermione knew she needed to stay away. Obviously he loathed her deeply. Hermione could see it in the way he stared at her on the occasional meal, eyes black and piercing into her skull, hatred seeping from them. Hermione wanted to cry every time he glared at her in disgust. She couldn't do this anymore. Even teaching the brightest of all students and teaching longer hours couldn't help with the throb that constantly panged in her empty heart.

* * *

Severus Snape groaned in his old leather chair. Head leaned back, feet raised and hand grasping a double load of fire whiskey; he glared at the fireplace. He was exhausted from teaching five lessons and having to deal with a detention later. Of course, that may have been Severus's fault. He'd been more easily aggravated than usual.

Every moment, Severus felt as if one little issue could make him explode. An imbecile fifth year named Adam Hodges had only spilled a small handful of fairly cheap frog eggs, but that was enough to send Severus into a rant on stupidity and carelessness, which resulted in an hour-long detention and was unwanted by both parties.

But now, in his own private chambers, he didn't fix his problems. Only drowned them. Gulping half the fire whiskey down, he closed his eyes and focused on the burning sensation. But instead he saw a flash of those honey amber eyes and curly, satin hair.

He moaned in agony as another feeling rushed over him again. She was ignoring him at all costs. _I've ruined everything. Every chance of kindling anything with her. _Severus stared at the ceiling when more thoughts occurred to him. _But what did I expect? Her to just forgive me without me changing at all? Of course not. Hermione Granger is kind, loyal, bright, but also very stubborn. I would know that by all those detentions I had to give her in her fifth and six years for back talk. _

Severus day-dreamed about those memories for a while, and then a determined look was set upon his face. _Why can't I just man up and try not to act like such a dick? She needs to know that a good side does exist inside me somewhere. And I'm going to start. Tomorrow._

* * *

Hermione smiled widely as students passed ahead of her towards the Great Hall. Hermione knew she shouldn't wish it, but she always hoped she'd be the last professor to arrive, and that a seat would be open next to Severus. It gave her a real excuse to not completely avoid him. And when she was near him, it always seemed quieter around her, more peaceful. Hermione could almost relax better around him than when she was anywhere else.

Her heart jumped as her prayer was answered. Only one seat on the very end of long the table was empty. Hermione could even avoid talking with someone on the other side of her, because there would be none. A meal with no need to think, because she knew Severus would _never_ try conversing with her, maybe other than _"Pass me the serving knife, Granger." _

Controlling her facial features to the best of her ability, Hermione silently sat next to the black clad, raven haired man. Hermione reached for the rolls which were in front of him and took a glance at him. It was a risk; he could yell at her for staring or something, but she couldn't help it. She peeked quickly, only to see the strangest look on his face she'd ever seen. He stared at the opposite wall and it almost seemed he was… gnawing on the inside of his check…

Almost as if he was nervous, Hermione did a similar thing when she was stressed or anxious. Placing the roll on her plate and buttering it lightly, Hermione glanced again and noticed his pale hands, laced together. Only instead of the usual unmoving pose, his thumbs were moving wildly all over the place.

Hermione stared for longer than she should have. Avoiding meant not only staying a good distance away, but also only looking at when necessary. Although, Hermione could make up a reason that would make her staring necessary. She just knew it would be wrong…

Hermione then tried her very hardest to focus on eating her meal. _I should have turned around and just not come to dinner when I saw the open seat. This was a horrid idea. It's only going to make things worse, make it hurt more… _

Hermione sighed deeply without realizing it. Severus had been trying his very best to act calm through the last couple minutes. He wanted to grab her hands and hold her close when she reached so near to him for the food. After promising himself he'd try yesterday, Severus was terribly nervous, and nerves never suited him.

He did not realize it until the inside of his cheek began to throb, but he must have been gnawing quite intensely. Gently prodding his tongue on the ragged inside of his mouth, he tasted the metallic, grotesque, taste of blood. Holding back the pain, he drank from his goblet quickly to erase the awful flavor.

He gently set the glass down and the throbbing in his cheek seemed of no importance when he heard the deep sigh on his left. It sounded tired and impatient. He looked over to her involuntarily and noticed Hermione staring at her barely touched plate.

Severus wanted to say something, anything that would get her attention on himself. He wanted to understand what made her sigh with such feeling. "What could be on your mind, Professor Granger?" He tried drawling with less sarcasm intended and more honest concern. It was difficult after all those years of feeling nothing.

He watched Hermione's every move as she jumped, startled at his sudden question. She jerked her head towards him and stared at Severus for a moment, forgetting the question all together.

She watched his eyebrows furrow slightly as she continued her gaze. Hermione thought he was angry, when in reality, he was hopelessly confused by her.

Severus made an uncomfortable, sudden movement and brought Hermione out of her embarrassing reverie of gazing. She thought on her feet, "Oh, well, I'm just a tad tired from all the lessons today, Professor. Teaching about advanced muggle food preparation to sixth years is harder than it may seem." She spoke without stuttering, shockingly. Even though it was a lie. All she really did for the sixth years was give them a recipe and directions to follow and then sit at her desk wallowing for the rest of the period. It sounded similar to what she'd seen a certain someone do many times…

Severus was lost in her voice speaking calmly towards him. Now he just needed to remain in control of his mouth and voice, and maybe she could forget the last conversation they'd had. " Well, it must be paying off. Students have never expressed such an interest in the subject. It must all be accredited towards your high teaching skills, yes?" He tried his best to compliment her, _that's what all women want right_?

Hermione smiled slightly, her mind was still very confused as to the atmosphere. Seveus Snape and Hermione Granger never spoke kindly to each other, it was unheard of. "Well, I think it is also due to the eased pressure of needing to hate all muggleborns. Without those ideas of equality beginning to come back, this class would be as it used to be. An easy class for laughing at." Hermione's voice turned slightly sour at the end, but she realized this and controlled her features to look happy.

"I couldn't agree more." Severus nodded. He himself felt the pressure and stress lifted from his shoulders. The bonds were let free, and all he wanted was to please this one muggleborn next to him. "But I would still be pleased if you would allow me to _observe _one of your lectures and see how you get them so engaged and interested." Severus only told part truth.

In reality he couldn't care less how to get students interested. If the student was not good at Potions early on, he would not be talented later in years. No teaching style could change that. But that didn't mean he didn't want to watch _her_ give a lecture. Sitting there for these few moments and listening to her voice was like heaven, he couldn't imagine what a few hours would be like.

Hermione was startled out of her mind by his statement. She had never in her entire life thought that Severus would want to sit in on one of her classes. Even if she had been teaching DADA and her students all had astounding marks, she thought Severus hated her too much to care. Her eyes grew large for a few moments.

Severus took those moments to his advantage to gaze into those lovely eyes. He saw such a mezmorizing amber brown color that they clouded his thoughts for a moment. He imagined getting to see those eyes every day and it made his chest tighten.

"I…I think that would be quite appropriate if you wish to join one of the classes. I am teaching a lecture on muggle chemistry to seventh years and I believe it may be of some interest to you, considering it's similarities to Potions, Professor." Hermione spoke, still shocked by what was occurring.

Severus did not like hearing Hermione call him by that horrid term any longer. He was no longer her superior. They were equals. "That sounds intriguing. I will intend on visiting as long as my schedule permits." Severus needed time to himself. He wanted to stay by her, but he knew he'd say something completely moronic if he continued. " I must take my leave. My students are expecting an exam in a few days, but I believe I shall throw it on them early. To see who's really paying attention and who just shoves as much information into their brains as they can the night before."

Hermione chuckled, understanding exactly what he meant. She could remember Ron doing the very thing for almost every assignment, project and exam. "Have a pleasant evening, Professor." She smiled at him, flashing her lovely teeth.

"You as well." He stood out of his chair, and before leaving; he said those last risky words. "And please, call me Severus."

* * *

**AHHH! Well I hope that was somewhat enjoyable to you all, I definitely enjoyed writing this! Don't forget to do that quick little thing that starts with an R and rhymes with view. :) Thanks for your support everyone.**

**-Summer**


	5. Lectures

**Before We Die**

**Chapter 5: Lectures**

**Hey everyone! I know it's been a week, but I've been on vacation. I'm still on it, but before I didn't have any wifi, and my muse was gone... But I got in the mood today and wrote you this! I really hope it's alright. We'll be getting to the goods sooner or later. ;) **

**Remember, reviews are like fuel for writers. You can't get anywhere without them! Short or long, I love all of them! Even those that give constructive criticism. Also, no flames, please. **

**_Sentences in italics are thoughts._**

**_Well, enjoy everyone! Watch as our favorite geniuses begin to spark. Love you all for reading!_**

* * *

"_Have a pleasant evening, Professor." She smiled at him, flashing her lovely teeth._

"_You as well." He stood out of his chair, and before leaving; he said those last risky words. "And please, call me Severus." _

Hermione's mind sputtered out for a moment as her eyes meticulously watched him leave the Great Hall. Being told that she was the most intelligent witch of her age did not count at the moment, because absolutely nothing was making sense to her. _What just happened? Did I, Hermione Granger, the Princess of Gryffindor, just have a calm and pleasant conversation with the Potions master? _

_Even more than that…. Did Severus actually compliment me on my teaching skills? _Hermione never in a million years had expected that. He _never_ praised anyone, ever. It was one of Hermione's few goals that had never happened. But now it was completed. It wasn't just a compliment either. Severus wanted to listen in on her class. This instantly made her nervous. Her class would have to be flawless; she'd have to make it as engaging and interesting as possible. _Maybe I could tell the students before hand… They could have premade questions… _

Hermione shook her head; she knew that would be wrong, and extremely silly. She didn't want Severus to think her a fake. No, she would go about her class as usual, he wouldn't make her nervous. Hermione was still determined to make this her best class yet.

_Oh yeah, he also said I could call him Severus._ It felt foreign to her. Yes, she did it all the time in her head, but saying it out loud would be a different story. Oh and to his face… She didn't know if she would actually be able to do that.

_I feel like some idiotic schoolgirl who only cares about boys._ Hermione had never been one to worry over the opposite sex like the rest of her girlfriends; she had many goals in life. She wanted things to happen. And now that life had been shortened up for her, Hermione had to get those things done soon.

But he still sat on the forefront of her mind, and Hermione was okay with that. There was now a chance… maybe.

Hermione went to bed that night, finally getting a restful night's sleep. No dreams of a dying Severus replaying over and over. Instead there were dreams of a completely different sort… Dreams Hermione would be extremely embarrassed and blush deeply about if anyone were to know about.

* * *

Severus could not believe what had just happened. He'd been able to get through those few minutes without rudely insulting her. He never truly meant those things he said in the years past. They were more of his safety blanket really. The girl made him anxious, and he involuntarily threw cruel words at her to make himself feel less vulnerable.

But now he knew how being kind to her felt. It was a feeling that warmed his entire being. The way she smiled at _him._ Severus had watched with jealousy when she smiled and hugged the imbeciles Weasley and Potter. Bile rolled up his throat, his stomach churned, and he almost wanted to die when Minerva had told him about Hermione's relationship with the red headed moron.

That month was torture. Every day he felt his reason for living these last few years was completely pointless. He laid in bed everyday, drinking, wallowing, and a few times crying his eyes out. He talked to almost no one, and lost much weight due to his rare eating. It was almost a repeat of his life after losing Lily.

Severus wanted to cry out in excitement and renewed strength when Poppy whined about the young couples split up during one of his check ups, but he couldn't give away his deepest secret. That moment he decided that he needed to show her how a real man could love her properly. That led him to this last moment where it was finally coming into play.

Severus planned to continue talking civilly with her. He knew that being too friendly with Hermione would confuse her too much, so he must take it slow, even though it was not to his taste. He only had so much time, so Severus wanted to make the most of it. But if wait was what was needed to have her, wait he would.

* * *

The next week Hermione sat down for breakfast, but she knew she couldn't eat. Her stomach was full with nerves, so she just gulped down coffee with no sugar or cream. Today she would be teaching with Severus Snape in the room, watching her, and probably scrutinizing her every word.

She'd had a dream, during the one hour she'd actually slept, in which he grew into a giant and began cursing at her and telling her that she was an idiotic girl and a stupid mudblood who had no right to teach wizards. His raised voice still haunted her, but seeing him that morning with a… pleasant look on his face?

That had surprised her immensely. Gnawing on the inside of her cheek, she chugged the last few ounces of her coffee before setting the mug down very loudly. The teachers near her wondered what had thrown Hermione off her normal calm and prepared self.

Severus sat calmly at the other end of the table, he'd successfully been able talk with her twice. Once to compliment her, and the second was to plan when he was to visit. Granted it only consisted of a few passing words in a hallway, but he still did it.

It took a lot of control to not continue on some stupid rant to make her stay, but Severus never made a fool of himself. Ever.

Today was the day he would sit in her class and listen to her talk for a matter of hours. Severus couldn't help but glance at her. Concern rose to his mind when he noticed her only drinking coffee, and the dark circles under her eyes. Anything that marred her perfection made him frustrated and angry.

Fighting off the temptation to go to her and ask her why she didn't eat that morning, he watched as she left the Great Hall, a worried look on her face. He knew that Hermione was probably a bit nervous, if he knew her to be the over achiever that she was. He knew that she wanted to prove herself to everyone. If Hermione only knew that in Severus's heart, she had completely won him over already. Nothing she did could change that.

* * *

Hermione watched as her eight seventh years arrived in her classroom. Three Gryffindors, two Ravenclaws, two Hufflepuffs, and one Slytherin. She smiled as Luna and the others greeted her good morning. Luna was a treat to teach, especially when she said the most entertaining things about muggles.

Just moments before the clock struck eight-thirty, Hermione watched the door creak open. Her breath hitched, but thankfully her students knew ahead of time about their special guest or else they would have made a big deal out of his entrance.

Hermione smiled at him quickly and stood from her desk. Her eyes watched Severus take a seat farthest in the back, and she began, "Good morning, everyone. As you all know, we have a guest Professor today. You all know Professor Snape." Hermione gestured towards him.

The class looked back, taking care not to look back too long and anger him, but he nodded in return to them. He couldn't smile; Severus had to keep up his stone attitude to the students, but after the class…. He had plans.

His eyes watched her silky, bouncy hair walk around the room. Notes appeared on the board. He recognized the pictures on the board vaguely. Severus remembered them to be atoms, a principle of chemistry. But he didn't really care; he just wanted to listen to her perfect voice.

Into the lecture, he couldn't help but notice how intelligent her students seemed to be. They actively participated, laughed and happily talked with their professor. Hermione argued their comments with finesse, and seemed to glow when she shared this information with her students. Severus loved to see her so happy, and wished to whatever god that he could, even for a short time, make her this joyful.

Severus had no recognition that a large smile had been placed on his face, but Hermione did. It gave her a newly found confidence, an energy that had previously not been there, even after a mostly sleepless night. To see the most intriguing smile on a cold, stone hearted man gave her also hope. Hope that she could get to him.

Hermione finished off the lesson with a simple experiment, to help the students see the similarities of chemistry to making a potion. Mixing two normally clear liquids could make them different colors such as red or purple. Hermione also explained the basics of acids, bases, and neutrals, and asked the students to figure out the substance's properties based on colors.

Hermione observed as the pairs worked quickly, but out of the corner of her eye, she watched Severus crane his neck to see all the students were doing. She hid a smile behind a curtain of curls, knowing that she had kept his interest during the lecture.

Finally, the students were complete, and Hermione took the last few minutes to explain their new paper on the benefits of understanding chemistry when in potions, which would be due in three days. Severus inwardly chuckled as she spoke of the length. _So she really does work them hard_. I reminded him of his own workload.

Hermione watched them exit the room, and expected with a saddened heart for Severus to exit with them. But on the contrary, he walked through the rows of desks and up to the front of the room.

Hermione's heart began to pick up pace as he neared her. His stride led him to mere feet in front of her, and Hermione tried not to gulp loudly.

Smiling sheepishly, Hermione spoke in her professoral voice, "I suppose that was a very long, boring lecture, yes?"

Severus ruffled his eyebrows, slightly confused. "On the contrary, I was quite _intrigued._ I've found I need to brush up on my muggle subjects more than I thought." He spoke, and surprisingly, the compliments came out with ease.

These words shocked Hermione. She had expected a stream of errors that he found in her lesson, or insults on her methods of teaching. But this side of Severus… She could definitely get used to it.

Of course, it was the snarky bastard that she fell in love with, but a soft side was welcomed just the same.

"Thank you, Professor. It means a lot to come from you." Hermione bit her tongue. She had not intended to say that at all.

Severus understood what she meant. He had been a total dick to her for the longest time, so hearing any nice words from him was foreign to Hermione. Severus Snape intended on changing that. "Call me, Severus." He stared at her, conveying his distaste with the title of Professor. "And, my compliments may not come frequently, but I don't say anything I don't mean." He chuckled. It was a lovely sound to Hermione's ears. "Well, at least not anymore. I apologize for my previous behavior."

Severus told himself he would try. And apologizing seemed like the first step to a friendship with Hermione. She needed to trust him, forgive him. Hermione stumbled upon her words, and out of shock she spoke, " I think after this war, everyone deserves a second chance. Dark times made everyone become someone they're not." She spoke with passion. _What am I saying to him? Why am I so open? And I don't know if I can call him Severus…_

"Well spoken, Professor Granger." He nodded and crossed his black clad arms across his chest.

"If I am to call you Severus, please call me Hermione." She retorted in a very snarky manner. Severus's spine tingled as the words slipped from her mouth. His name rolled off her tongue like honey. He could imagine her calling him that in other situations… _Don't think about that right now! _

"Hermione, I so enjoyed your lecture, and I can really see how much of an intellect you are. I think would enjoy your company on my nightly patrols some evening. We may be able to discuss more deeply your knowledge of muggle chemistry. I really must improve on those skills." Severus almost sighed after saying it. This was the moment of truth. If she said yes, she didn't mind his company, and she had forgiven him. If no…then he had no idea what he would do.

Hermione's hands were trembling behind her back. _He wants to talk with me more!_ "I would enjoy that, Severus." Hermione smiled up at him. He really seemed tall when he was so close to her. "I have to patrol on Wednesday, how does that sound?"

Severus was crying out in relief in his mind. "That sounds…_delightful."_

* * *

**Well everyone, I hope you all enjoyed this last installment! Writing about Sev just gets me all happy and jittery. I love him too much. jk. You can never love him too much! **

**-Summer**


	6. Huts and Dates

**Before We Die **

**Chapter 6: Huts and Dates**

**Oh no! I'm soooo sorry I haven't posted in weeks! I feel so sorry, it's just my muse decided to go on vacation or something. But I hope she's back now, and to stay for a awhile. Hey, good news though! This is my longer chapter yet! Anyways... I didn't get a single review for chapter 5. That was a little disappointing because I know you're out there people! **

**So please, think of an author. How do you expect someone to keep pumping out the chapter when they get no encouragement or even acknowledgement that they are doing an okay job! I love ideas and constructive criticism.**

**I forgot that time, I think. I do not own anything HP! J.K Rowling is our goddess, and she gets all the fame and glory. I only get this plot to my story. **

**Sentences in _italics_ are thoughts. **

**Well, that's enough blabbering. Hope you enjoy this! Please, please, please review!**

* * *

Hermione went up to her rooms after her last class of the day. She felt as if nothing could possible get her down. Everything was just so perfect, is was too unreal. Never in a million years had she expected such a positive reaction from the stone of a man. He…enjoyed her lecture. She never thought that she could say that with confidence. Hermione was left without words.

Not only that but he wanted to learn even more from her. Hermione had always thought him to be a most prideful man. Which, he definitely still is, but had he actually _tried_ to change himself? _For her?_ Hermione shook her head, she couldn't get her hopes up like that, just to have them bashed into a billion pieces later on. She couldn't pretend. She needed real. Real life, even though it may bring some hardships, always ended in a more satisfying way than everything going perfectly smooth.

Hermione made herself a mug of peppermint tea and wrapped herself in a blanket. After casting a quick incendio at the fireplace, Hermione took out her fifth year's papers. You'd think by that time in a student's life that they might learn how to space their words from each other and connect the top of O's and remember to make a period at the end of each sentence. But sadly, no. Hermione always had a few student's papers which she spent more time correcting grammar, because she couldn't understand a single thing the pupil was attempting to convey. Or not convey…

Hermione must have fallen asleep, because Crookshanks was weaving in and out of her legs. The little ball of orange fluff was telling her it was dinnertime. She smiled groggily and stretched a moment. Glancing out her window, she figured it was around seven. She'd barely make it to dinner if she left now… And most of the food would be gone anyways.

A stream of smoke near the woods caught her eye. Hermione smiled. She knew the perfect way to end her lovely day. She hadn't talked with him for a week or two.

Hermione rushed to her small kitchen, adorned with light birch wood cabinets and pulled out some food for her cat. He meowed in pleasure as she set his small dish on the floor.

Hermione didn't feel too hungry, but she grabbed an apple to snack on while she walked over to her destination. After checking her hair in the mirror quickly and grabbing a light cloak, for the sun was setting and the temperature dropping, she left her rooms.

She almost skipped through the halls. But Hermione was never one to make a fool of herself, so she just strolled through the walls of chattering paintings and took bites of her apple. But the paintings noticed that she had the most ridiculous smile on her face, and they chuckled as she passed.

The evening air was perfect. A light breeze rustled around her. This was Hermione's favorite time of the year. Early autumn. The leaves of the Forbidden Forest were beginning to change, and the dark wood almost looked… beautiful. The smell of the air was so fresh and clear. She wanted to throw her arms up and spin around, but that was quite silly.

So, she contented herself by just humming a light tune and swinging her arms back and forth a bit more as she walked. Her smile could not be defeated today. Hope was sparkling in her eyes, and happiness was in her smile.

Hermione thought she was all alone in her acts, but a pair of dark, onyx eyes was watching her every move, fighting the urge to smile as well at the curly haired woman enjoying the outside.

* * *

"'Ermione! Wat're you doin' ere?" Hagrid opened the door to his hut after she had knocked. He smiled the most grand of smiles. It made Hermione feel so happy as well.

"Well, can't a friend just come to visit and chat sometimes?" Hermione smiled and entered the hut.

She couldn't help it. Her mood was so light hearted, she had to share it. Hermione embraced Hagrid around the waist. She could be herself around Hagrid. He was such a kind hearted man...giant...whatever.

Hagrid chuckled deeply and patted her back. "Wha's got you in such a good mood?"

Hermione let him go. "Oh nothing. Just everything seems to be going my way for once." Hermione took a seat at his extra large table after he gestured. She couldn't tell him exactly what had her all entangled in happiness, the fact that she was absolutely in love with Severus Snape and that he may have accepted her as an equal. But she could tell him the basics. Hermione wasn't one for lying too much anymore.

Hagrid smiled as he bustled about his small home. " Why don' cha tell me abou' it? I'll be makin' a bi' o tea if ya'd like some."

Hermione was happy enough to even drink Hagrid's tea. Now _that_ was a miracle in itself. She smiled and got herself comfortable. "Well, I've gotten to teach at the place that I've felt most at home in. About a subject that inspires me everyday. I've seen the difference it's making in the student's already. They are beginning to see the benefits of understanding and tolerance. Some of my students are actually quite interested by the subject." Hermione sighed happily and mentally patted herself on the back. A little bit of pride was okay every now and then. "Something even more encouraging happened today. Not only do my student's appreciate the class, but the most despised and stern teacher in all of Hogwarts visited my class today and actually complimented me on all I've done!"

Hermione stared at Hagrid as the light turned on in his head. "No! Professor Snape spoke positively abou' yuh?"

Hermione nodded enthusiastically. "I never expected it, that's for sure. I have been praised by every single one of my teachers and superiors, but never once has he spoken to me without insults or harsh tones… It was quite strange. But I was very happy to receive that moment." Hermione's voice was turning a little dreamy, almost to the tone that Luna would always speak in. Spacey and distant.

Hagrid just smiled, oblivious to her odd behavior. " Tha's wonderful 'ermione!" He chuckled once again. "Bu' I still can' inmagine Snape sayin' tha"

Hermione laughed with him. Her visit continued until almost midnight, they talked about many things. Hagrid talked about a new shipment of firenewts he was expecting any day now. He planned to show the fourth years how to calm them down enough to be able to hold them and not get burnt.

Hermione talked about lighthearted things. Normally, her heart was weighed down by everything. Her past, the things she lost. Her parents gone and forgotten about her. She was down because of a failing amount of confidence and hope. But most of all, she was weighed down by the lack of time and a feeling of uselessness to her life. Previously she never believed she would get love. Hermione almost felt it was impossible for her to have, just out of reach every time she got close.

But now, even with her life span slashed painfully and unfairly short, Hermione had more hope than she'd ever had. She didn't think it was possible, but Hermione was more happy in these moments of her life than she was when she just began going to Hogwarts.

Somewhere Hermione and Hagrid had switched from tea to fire whiskey. Hagrid insisted on celebrating with a _few_ drinks, even though Hermione had protested about having classes the next day. But boy was she happy the drinking started.

She was only lightly tipsy when she walked happily back to the stone castle. Sliding off her clothes, she slipped into bed in just a t-shirt and panties. Sighing happily, Hermione fell into one of the most restful nights sleep she'd ever had. Some would say it was the alcohol, but Hermione would beg to differ.

* * *

Although her almost too happy high had faded, Hermione was still feeling confident and steady on Wednesday evening. That night at dinner it dawned on her when she saw the dark man eating, a curtain of raven hair hiding his face. Tonight was the night they planned on patrolling together. He wanted to learn more about muggle subjects.

Hermione panicked for a moment, but her new attitude slapped her in the mind. _Don't worry. It'll be fine. Don't go ruinning everything we've worked for to get to this point in your emotional state. It's just as important as him_. Hermione needed to keep reminding herself this in the future.

Around ten o'clock, Hermione headed in the direction of the dungeons, figuring she'd run into Severus on her way there. Hermione loved her evening patrols. They were moments to reflect. To dream. Dreaming was something Hermione did a lot these days.

Some would say that having lots of dreams when you only have a set amount of time to live is bad. That you shouldn't get your hopes up, when in reality none of those dreams could practically get done, and you'd be sad and discontent in the end.

But Hermione knew dreams were vital in life. Dreams were what got you up in the morning to continue on with life. Dreams gave you a target to aim for every time you tried to do something. Dreams had gotten Hermione through many rough patches, so she was leaning on them now as well. They were, by the way, what gave her the strength to have this moment with Severus. Dreams of a complete life.

Hermione was caught of up a daydream of getting another cat when she heard the voice quite near to her. Right next to her actually. "Good evening, Hermione." His silky voice sent shivers down her spine.

"Hello, Severus." She smiled lightly. "I'm glad I found you." She hoped that statement didn't imply too much…

"As do I. Shall we walk?" He wanted so badly to hold his arm out for her to take, to touch her, but he knew it would be taken badly.

Hermione nodded and held up a dull lumos from her wand. They walked in silence for a few minutes, Severus was not one hundred percent sure where to start. He was very nervous. He was driven almost mad at not knowing how she had felt after talking with him two days earlier.

"Hermione, I know I said I wanted to know more about that muggle Chemistry, but theres something else I want to learn about. I never had the chance to learn much about muggles. Even though my father was one, he didn't really help my view of them." He sighed. "You have muggle parents, who better to learn about them but from you?" He stared into her eyes for a moment. He gazed in awe at how her eyes shimmered in the light of their wands.

"What would you like to know?" Hermione spoke, trying her best to speak smoothly. His words had confused her.

"Well, I'd like to understand the basics really. My family isn't normal, yours seems to be." He tried not to notice the slight noise that came from her when he said those words. "Tell me about how your muggle families _should_ work."

Hermione hadn't spoken of family in a long time. But she couldn't be untruthful to him. It repulsed her to do so. She took a very deep breath and began. "Your typical muggle family is like this. A mother and father are usual married between the ages of 20-27. And the majority of parents have a child a few years after marriage. If they went to college and have good jobs, the family can have a large house and usually has multiple cars. Usually when they have children, one of the parents works away from home while the other stays and runs the household…" Hermione continued for maybe ten minutes or so and stopped when he seemed satisfied. He knew she was having a difficult time with certain things she said, but he wouldn't ask her now. That would be horribly rude.

"Thank you for informing me, Hermione. I believe I shall maybe pay a visit to muggle London one of these days. It sounds so much more intriguing when you speak of it. I've always heard from wizards how pathetic and weakly the muggles live, but I may believe differently." Severus smirked at Hermione. "All the credit goes to one Miss Granger. To repay the favor what would you like to know?"

"Tell me about something you enjoy from potions." Severus cocked one eyebrow in her direction. Hermione chuckled and smiled. "Old instincts never die. I can't help it. Do you have any theories? I've always been fascinated by the origins of potions. Do you know anything of that sort?"

Severus laughed darkly, it shook Hermione's core and made her melt. " I know plenty of the sort, I just can't guarantee you won't die of boredom."

Hermione scoffed. "You're saying that to the one who spends her weekends reading about ancient runes and astronomy for fun."

"Oh yes, of course." Severus spoke sarcastically and began telling Hermione all about the origins of growth serums. Hermione gazed at him with those eyes the entire time. There were moments when her intensity made him want to push her into a broom closet and take her like some hormonal teenager.

"I've talked about this for an hour, Hermione. If it intrigues you so much, why not come down to my chambers and see my collection of potion history books." He spoke the words before he could realize what he meant. He just invited Hermione Granger down to his most secret, personal rooms to read!

Hermione was struck with the statement. He… wanted her to visit him in the dungeons. To spend more time together reading. She was in such pure bliss, she almost forgot to speak. But his furrowing eyebrows and fallen expression aligned her thoughts again.

"That would be lovely, Severus. I could maybe bring some muggle books you'd enjoy with me as well." She smiled up at him as they neared the end of their rounds.

"Why not this Friday? After dinner?" Severus spoke all too eagerly; he prayed to the gods that she'd say yes.

"It's a date." Hermione opened her eyes widely after she said it.

* * *

**uh oh! A baby cliffhanger! Sorry again about the mini hiatus I went on. But lets pray my muse sticks around! I really hope you've been enjoying this story. I'm quite proud of it. Say it with me guys! REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!**

**:)-Summer**


	7. Well, Shit

**TAAA DAA! Wow, I feel like such an awful person... It's been like way to many months since I posted a new chapter... And this one isn't even as long as most of the previous chapters... Please forgive me. I've been having a lot of stress from school, family life, etc. My uncle suddenly fell ill and is now fighting lymphoma, and my Grandma just lost it basically and is now in the mental ward because of the stress. I am very close with my family, especially my dad's side (my uncle and grandma). My uncle is fighting valiantly with kemo, so I keep praying that he continues and can win this battle. It's break now though, so I hope that I'll be in the right mindset to write more. **

**Anyways, I don't own Harry Potter, that is all the amazing J.K Rowling. :) _Also, Italics are thoughts._**

**Please remember to review and let me know if you guys are still out there and don't hate me TOO much. I'll understand why some of you guys might not like me very much anymore... **

**Also, some of the reviews from last chapter said that it was too happy. Yeah, I did go back and I do agree that Severus was a bit out of character. Sometimes my emotions get the better of me and my writing is effected by it. Ergo why this chapter is a little bit sadder...**

**Without further ado, here is chapter 7! **

* * *

**Before We Die **

**Chapter 7: Well, Shit.**

"Shit. Shit, shit, shit!" Hermione mumbled as she paced her bedroom, hands clenching and unclenching. "I'm such an idiot!" With an exasperated sigh, Hermione ungracefully fell onto her bed. "Why did I just run away?"

She couldn't help but replay the horrific moment over and over again…

"_It's a date." Hermione didn't exactly realize what had just come out of her mouth until Severus's eyes suddenly grew twice as large and he didn't respond. Hermione was looking everywhere but his face now. Her mouth became dry, and nothing would come out. "I…" She said, barely a whisper. _

_Then she bolted. _

Hermione glared at her ceiling. "I've ruined everything." So much for a good mood…

* * *

Severus sat in his favorite reading chair, clutching a second glass of fire whiskey. Thoughts were buzzing erratically through his brain, analyzing everything he had said and done that night in Hermione's presence. He didn't understand. What did he do wrong?

Maybe she came to her senses and realized that socializing with him was the stupidest thing she could do. No one, maybe besides Minerva, could ever enjoy Severus's company. He was boring, not funny, rude, and ugly. _Why would she ever be interested in me? Let alone be an acquaintance. She probably was only there with me out of pity. I am truly pathetic to think that she could have actually wanted to be there with me. Maybe I'm finally going crazy from this curse._

But he couldn't help but wonder why she still seemed so genuinely happy. Her eyes were sparkling, if his memory wasn't deceiving him. _Then why did she just leave so abruptly? Why did she play with my mind by saying, "It's a date." _

Severus gasped and dramatically put his head in his hands. _What if she knows my feelings and this is all some cruel game to toy with me? I guess it just serves you right, you cruel, worthless shit of a man. _Severus was known for his self-loathing.

Severus blamed himself. He always blamed himself. Anything that went wrong he always said that it could have been different if he only tried harder. On the outside, this was almost impossible to be seen, but inside, his mind was plagued with guilt and thoughts of "What if I had… " and, "I should have done this instead…"

He downed the rest of his glass in a burning gulp, reveling in the pain the liquid made as it slid down his throat. In moments he was pouring another glass. Slumping down in his chair and grumbling more to himself, Severus sipped at this third glass. The one thing he could be glad about on this dreadful evening, was not having an 8 o clock class tomorrow, because he needed to get _hammered._

* * *

Hermione was the one who always knew what to do. She was always the one with all the needed knowledge. It was her duty as a part of the Golden Trio to always have the answer. Yet anything having to do with love, she was clueless.

Especially when it came to the one man that made her weak at the knees and her thoughts jumble up.

So basically, Hermione sat at breakfast the next morning with no clue what to do. She glared at her half eaten piece of toast and mumbled nothingness of frustrations. Apparently she was mumbling just loud enough that McGonagall decided to join her and strike up a conversation.

"What is the meaning of this gloomy state you seem to be in, Hermione?" the older woman spoke, concern filling her voice. Hermione was beginning to think of Professor McGonagall as her second mother. Hermione could talk to her and then receive a very wise and logical response of advice. Normally, talking with Minerva was a treat, but right now, Hermione felt like she was about to burst into tears at any moment.

"Yesterday you seemed like you could conquer the world, but now it appears as if someone had died." Minerva placed her hand on Hermione's. She hadn't realized it, but apparently she had been wringing her hands together very tightly. "What happened?"

Hermione sighed. She knew she shouldn't be acting like this, not here. _Oh I don't know, Minerva. I'm just the most idiotic person alive. I'm dying, and have no guarantee that I will live till tomorrow. Oh, and also, I'm in love with the Potions Professor, who will never in his right mind love me back. _

"Just stressed from work. Lots of test to grade." Hermione lied. Attempting to smile, but she guessed that it probably looked more like a cringe than anything else.

Minerva saw right through Hermione's façade. "Hermione, you love grading. I know you better than to think this is something minor." She spoke, staring straight at Hermione who couldn't look Minerva back in the eyes.

"It is nothing to worry about, Minerva, honestly." Hermione grasped her coffee and took a long sip, trying not to flinch from the fact that it was still burning hot.

"Well," Minerva spoke calmly, "If it really is nothing, you will not mind meeting me after hours in my office at around 7:30." Hermione's breath caught in her throat, and was about to make up some other obligation that she already had but McGonagall beat her to it. "No excuses." And with that, Minerva left smiling, saying good morning to Professor Demicus.

Hermione was instantly nervous about the forth coming evening. What could she say to Minerva? What would she want to know? She couldn't go on lying forever, because Hermione felt horribly guilty already.

* * *

Severus sat at his desk, watching his fifth year Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs attempt to make a cure for bone deep burns. His head was still throbbing from how much he drank last night. A hangover potion provided nausea relief, but he was still exhausted and had a splitting headache. That might have also been from the fact that he hadn't eaten anything for breakfast or lunch because he didn't want to face Hermione. But Severus really tried not to think about that right now.

_What am I supposed to do? Just leave her be now. She obviously does not enjoy my company, she only pities me. And I don't want pity. Maybe just watching from afar and being allowed glances and thoughts is enough? Maybe I can live without her truly in my life? It seems like I'm going to have too…_

But he knew inside that that was a complete lie. Now that he had learned and experienced conversations with her and time spent with her, he yearned for it with his whole being, even if he didn't admit it. He wanted it so bad. His thoughts were plagued with her face, her voice, her body, her personality. He wanted it so bad. He wanted it to be_ his_. Severus had never wanted anything so much in his entire life.

But Severus never believed himself to be very important at all. Actually, he believed himself to be dog shit on a scale of importance. If anyone deserved anything, it was definitely never going to be him. Severus was convinced that fate would never be kind to him.

He sighed and continued watching the imbeciles struggle with the potion that would take Severus half the time and energy that they seemed to be using. And his would be twice as powerful. But of course, that didn't matter for anything. Nothing he did ever mattered for anything…

* * *

"Sit, Hermione." Minerva motioned towards the sofa that Minerva had added to the headmaster's office. Hermione sat stiffly on the velvety smooth couch and tried to control her breathing. "Would you like any tea?" Minerva motioned to the tray on her desk and it floated over towards the two witches.

"Um… Yeah." Hermione almost never spoke so unintelligently. She was just so nervous about what this conversation was about to unveil. The teapot poured a cup of the brown liquid into a Gryffindor colored cup. It again floated over to Hermione.

"So Hermione." Minerva began. "I've asked you to my office because I'm concerned. You have always been one of my favorite students. And really, if I am honest, you were probably my most favorite from all my years of teaching." Minerva smiled, and Hermione could not help but smile back. She was after all, a complete teachers pet all throughout school. And still was under that habit…

"And because I care so much about you, I notice when something is up." McGonagall spoke in her more serious tone. "This is where you come in." Hermione assumed that this was when she was supposed to talk.

_What does she want me to say? What does she expect? Has she already guessed? Did Madame Pomfrey tell her about the curse? Or worse… did Severus say that I had acted like a crazy person and spoke of a date with my much older Professor?_ "What do you want me to say?" _At least that wasn't a lie…_

"Why don't you start with what had you so upset this morning." Minerva spoke gently. "Everything you say will stay with me and only me." She reassured.

Maybe it would be okay to tell her some things. Minerva was much older and had experienced much more than Hermione had, even if they had both survived wars. It was just how much to tell her… "Well, I said something stupid to someone who matters a lot to me, and I think I've ruined everything." Hermione's voice quivered as the words came out of her mouth.

"Continue, Hermione. I can only help unless I really know what the problem is." Minerva reached over and grasped one of Hermione's hands, the one not holding the teacup.

Hermione closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Well, I guess it starts with the person I love…"

* * *

**Well, I really hope the wait was worth it... Again, please forgive my hiatus, and don't forget to review. It would mean the world to me! **

**-Summer**


	8. Go With the Flow

**Before We Die**

**Chapter 8: Go With the Flow**

**Song for chapter: The Bomb Dot Com V2.0- Sleeping With Sirens**

**Hey! Yep, I'm not dead, and I haven't abandoned this! My life has just been really crazy the last few months. My uncle has actually been a miracle. Doctors were amazed by how well he's done with the Kemo. He is gaining weight, blood tests came back amazing, and the best part is that his bone marrow is cancer free! He won't have to have a transplant as far as we know. So, he's in recovery and my family and I are rejoicing. It's so amazing because his lymphoma was very advanced and his recovery chances were minimal, so this was just a miracle.**

**I've been busy with life. I served in another country, which was really impactful. I'm on my spring break, so that's why I'm writing. I just haven't had any inspiration for anything lately. I don't really know why, but NONE of my stories seem to be going the way I want. So, that leads me to another thing. At the end of the chapter, I have some questions for you guys. It'd be awesome to get some feedback! Plus, I know a lot of you want a certain thing to happen. ;)**

**Also, you might've noticed the song below the title of this chapter. Well, I've decided to put a song that I was listening to while writing this that popped out to me. "It's all for the sake of love.", "It's all for you.", and "You who are all alone." Are some of the lyrics from the song. I just thought they kinda fit the circumstances that Severus and Hermione are dealing with in the story. Living their days, but barely getting by. Only the hope of love is keeping them going. I'm a music whore, so I also can't help but share one of the favorite songs with you guys. Sleeping With Sirens is seriously an amazing band. **

**Sorry about the long author's note. I really need to learn to cut down on these... :/ Oh well. Probably won't happen.**

**Read, review, but most importantly, ENJOY!**

"Well, I guess it starts with the person I love…" Hermione trailed off, not really knowing where she was going with this. A panic attack was hovering on the surface of Hermione's sanity, and she needed to calm down some how or she'd end up breaking down like a child in front of her headmaster. She felt like a student again.

"Tell me what I need to know, Hermione. Don't work yourself up over this. I just need to know enough so that I can help you." Minerva spoke and sat next to Hermione, setting her hand on Hermione's back, just like her mother used to do…

Hermione knew Minerva was right. If she didn't tell _someone_ it would eat her alive. "I've, I've known for awhile now about this person. That I love him. But I hadn't really gotten much of a chance to talk with him. We never really saw eye to eye on anything, but that just made me love him more. He challenges me so much." Hermione spoke, tears pricking in her eyes. "And recently, we've gotten to know each other a bit. He seemed like he actually was interested by me, like he didn't loath me anymore. We laughed and joked together and everything was going fine yesterday, until he said we should meet again. I… I guess I said it was a date. He didn't say anything back, so I-I ran."

Hermione tentatively looked up at Minerva, expecting to find something much different than what was there. A…smile? "How long did you wait before you left?"

"A few seconds, but his eyes got all big and he…" Hermione's voice faded off as she saw her old professor's face. She was chuckling and smiling.

"Hermione, have you ever been in love before?" Minerva asked, trying to control her laughter. Hermione, the ever intelligent, was utterly confused.

"I…I liked Ronald for a time, but it was nothing compared to this." Hermione looked at her hands, not particularly liking to reminisce on her days with Ron. He was a great friend, but not lover material…

"That would explain a lot then." Minerva nodded to herself. "I think it's just you Hermione. You've never been in love before. You're second guessing your actions too much. You took his natural pause of thought as him being surprised and you taking his offer in the wrong way."

Hermione knew this in the back of her mind already. She was just so used to him shoving her down and making fun of her. A kind Severus was strange, but definitely welcome to Hermione. Deep inside she knew it was her fear of rejection that kept her from staying. _I've ruined things again by my stupid overreacting. _"What do I do then?"

Professor McGonagall took Hermione's hand in hers. "Just continue what you've been doing. Talking, being friends. Just be natural. Who ever this man is, I bet he was just a bit unprepared. Not unpleased. Let's face it, you're not the most outward of people, Hermione. You usually over think things, not blurt them out."

It made sense to Hermione. _But how do I go about being normal? What if I just make things awkward again by saying something stupid? _

Hermione nodded to herself, thinking things through. She would confront him, try to just talk. Maybe they could still meet, but _not_ as a date.

_Just go with it. But how do I learn how to do that when each second that passes me by gets me closer to the moment where this curse takes total control of me and I die?_

* * *

Severus was pacing through the halls the next evening, pondering or rather sulking about his life. Would things ever go his way? Maybe he was just destined for no happiness in life. He was a life brought back to light, then laughed at and given an expiration date. _Bet God's having quite the laugh at me now._ _Destined to die, and forever alone. _

Severus, the ever depressing, had his head hung low and walked with much less confidence than usual. His walk was more sluggish than striding. He wasn't really paying attention to anything in the hallways. Students could be doing...who knows what in the paths and he probably wouldn't notice.

And, that wasn't normal for Severus. Course, nothing about him was normal anymore. Except his ever present hate for himself and the world.

He continued roaming the castle, continuing his sulking until a petite body suddenly rammed into his chest.

A slight gasp escaped the woman's mouth as Severus knew immediately who it was. She quickly tensed and backed away, looking up at the black fabric wall she'd just run into during her walk back form Minerva's office.

Severus didn't really know what was happening, or what he was doing just then, but he couldn't control it. No matter what he told himself, he couldn't just ignore her when she was right in front of him.

"Deep in thought, Hermione?" He spoke, almost chuckling. She just looked so… flustered. It was a very… _appealing_ look on her. And he needed to keep her attention, needed to talk to her.

Hermione's eyes widened momentarily as she processed what just happened. _God, I have wonderful timing…_ _Minerva said I should just be natural like we were, but I wasn't prepared for NOW!_

"Something like that." Hermione couldn't help but smile a bit as she glanced at his face. He didn't seem mad at her for running into him. "I was headed back to my room after a meeting with Minerva."

"What did the old woman want from her favorite student?" Snape spoke as they automatically continued walking, Hermione noted, as if nothing had happened. _Maybe I did overreact… _

Hermione smiled, looking at her feet. "Just tea and a little intelligent chit chat."

"Ha! I've never heard a bigger lie! That woman hates chit chat. Only meddling and big issues concern her. But I won't pry." Hermione looked to her right, glancing at his face. He was smirking to himself and the dim candle light of the hallway made him look warmer than usual, less menacing. Not that she didn't like the usual Severus look, in fact she wouldn't have him any other way, but this look was nice for occasions.

Hermione didn't really know what she should say next. With this new revelation of her overthinking, she kept…_overthinking about overthinking!_ _I'm such a freak! I can't handle a normal conversation with him at all now! _

"How were your lessons today?" Severus either recognized the lengthened silence and decided to kill it, or he read Hermione like a book. Hermione hoped it to be the the first of those things.

_Goddamn, be more generic will you, man? _Severus mentally groaned at his question. _She's probably laughing her arse off in her head_. _Lessons are always the same, no one asks about them…_

"They were… challenging. Third years just don't grasp the idea of E-mail." Hermione was happy that the conversation was simple. She could handle simple right now. Any more and she would probably crumple up and have a panic attack.

"And I still don't. Owls are just as fast in the long run." Severus spoke snarkily. Hermione smiled to herself as she listened to him go off on a tangent about the efficiency of owls. Yes. She liked this side better. The passionate, intelligent, somewhat snarky and egotistical side.

Hermione realized what was happening a few minutes later when they arrived at her room. Hermione was hoping to just get inside and breath. She couldn't deny that she loved being in his presence, but she also needed time to clear her head and assess _herself_.

However, Severus had different plans. He _had_ to know. "Will we still be meeting tomorrow? After dinner?"

Hermione's heart beat faster and her breathing hitched. _He… He still wants to meet?_

"I… I'm looking forward to it." Hermione smiled. _What the hell? Where did that come from?_

"Good. Then, until tomorrow." Hermione's eyes grew as Severus bowed slightly. "Good night, Hermione."

"Good night, Severus." Hermione quickly slipped through her portrait, her breathing slowing to a _healthy_ speed. _So natural it is I guess._

* * *

Severus turned on his heel and headed towards his own chambers in the dungeons. He had a smirk on his face, and his chest felt… full, heavy, warm?

_What the hell is happening to me?_

**_So, I hope that wasn't too_ ****awful. I felt that I needed to give you guys SOMETHING, so this was the result. I'm really trying, really. Just... idk. Things happen. Life happens. Didn't edit all that much either, so yeah. MERP****  
**

**Annnnd, I said I had a question for you all.**

**So, I had originally planned for the build up to their relationship to be pretty slow and such, but I know some of you guys are dying for them to finally realize they love each other already! (I know I am!) However, I still don't want a super sudden relationship that happens in a week. So options:**

**1. I speed up time within the chapters. Like a few weeks could happen within a chapter, with mentions of minor events, so we can get to the goods of the story faster. (In my outline of the story, most of the interesting stuff has to happen after they get together...) **

**2. Continue the way I've been doing things, kinda slowly with detail about "every" interaction and a ton of build up.**

**Thanks for sticking with me guys! I can't tell you how much I love you all! Reviews=LOVE 3 Stay strong. **


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